5 Ways to Start Positive Confrontation


By: Ana Margarita Olar| Executivechronicles.com

Confront in itself conveys a negative thought. But regardless of our hesitation, we cannot avoid confronting other people.

If we want to grow as a person, if we want to straighten out any misunderstandings, we need to engage in confrontation. But how to we start POSITIVE confrontation?

Here are some key strategies:


Remove your anger, your fear, and your excitement. Don’t allow your emotions to cloud your mind. If you are on a verge of anger, have a deep breath. Don’t react to your emotions. STOP and THINK. Identify the real problem you need to address.

Focus not on the person but on the problem. Shouting, cursing, and blaming is certainly not a good way to start a positive confrontation. Once you let go of your emotions, you are ready to face the person.

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Confronting is very different from fighting. Set the stage for a heart to heart and mind to mind talk with the concerned person. And the best thing to do it is doing it in private. Never blurt out in public that you want to talk to the person.

Remember, if you want to have a positive confrontation you must start it in a positive and nonjudgmental manner. Approach the person and ask if you can talk in private.


Be harsh on the issue but be gentle with the person. Address the issue and focus on it. You may have other personal agendas with the person but deal with it separately. Focus on the problem. Lay down the problem as objective as possible.

Point out the things that this particular person has done and its consequences without judging the person. And never ever name drop. Don’t put other person’s opinions or agendas and just focus on the problem at hand.


This is one important key on how to start a positive confrontation. Lend your ears. Once you had laid down the agenda, learn how to listen. STOP TALKING.

Give the person the chance to explain his point of view. Provide an open communication. If you are brave enough to give the person a chance to say everything he has in mind then face it.


You cannot solve the problem alone. The fact that you need to confront the person means that you have to come up with a resolution together or as a team.

Identify the problems and if possible, explore and discuss potential solutions and alternatives focusing on both parties’ individual needs and wants.

Discuss the positive and negative implications of each suggestion before accepting or rejecting it.

Engaging in a positive confrontation gives each party the chance to grow, develop professional but healthy boundaries, promote teamwork in spite of the diversity of thoughts, and better decision making.